When I had crushes, I used to always deny it. I would never discuss it. If someone asked me who I liked, I would say…nobody<\/i>. I never revealed who I was fond of. Mostly, because I believed I had no chance. If there was ever an opportunity, I would never take it. If he asked me what I felt, I would think he was making fun of me. I would insult him back.<\/p>\n
As I grew older, I realized that I had my own charms. I grew my own confidence.<\/p>\n
During my freshman year, I never let my own feelings come to the surface. I was seeking strong friendships more than anything. And so when I was talking to a friend about Alan (way before Alan and I got together), she suddenly turned to me and said, \\”You like him, don\\’t you?\\” She laughed. I laughed in response.<\/p>\n
\\”Stop denying it, Jenn. You know it.\\” She pressed me.<\/p>\n
I didn\\’t answer her. I just gave her a stern look. I remember I was walking with her to the corner of the extension buildings. Dwight and that street up from Bowditch.<\/p>\n
As the next years past, I grew accustomed to telling selected friends who I liked. Sometimes I felt that i degraded myself into a hopeless teenage girl, pining after someone at a distance. Worse yet, I have the tendency to like those that are taken. Whoops.<\/p>\n
But I dislike my pining pining part of myself too much. It\\’s not like i need<\/i> anybody now.<\/p>\n
There was a story I read today in a resident\\’s room. An engineer and the frog. As an engineer, is there even enough time for a true-love relationship?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
When I had crushes, I used to always deny it. I would never discuss it. If someone asked me who I liked, I would say…nobody. I never revealed who I was fond of. Mostly, because I believed I had no chance. If there was ever an opportunity, I would never take it. If he asked … Continue reading silly me<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-26","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=26"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=26"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=26"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=26"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}