I just want to cry. Let the tears seep into my pillow as I used three years ago. When I was lonely and distraught.<\/p>\n
I almost feel the same way, but I am not as…shaken. I am too strong now. That I almost don\\’t let tears fall. I don\\’t even recall the last time that I was shaken up that I cried. When Carol and Marina moved out back in Pittsburgh, the drama, the trauma all left me. And nothing has upset me as much since. I am living a life with just simple pain. And I wish I could let it overwhelm me, but that\\’s not how it works anymore.<\/p>\n
I miss Chris, of course. But it doesn\\’t pull me down as much as things used to. I am not a huddling ball on my bed, having fainting spells. I go out and try to find something better.<\/p>\n
It\\’s not black. It\\’s clear and lit. Come back to me and I\\’ll feel so much better. But go away and I am lost. But I am not afraid to figure out the way myself.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I just want to cry. Let the tears seep into my pillow as I used three years ago. When I was lonely and distraught. I almost feel the same way, but I am not as…shaken. I am too strong now. That I almost don\\’t let tears fall. I don\\’t even recall the last time that … Continue reading Dried tears stream<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-419","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/419","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=419"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/419\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=419"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=419"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=419"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}