That almost sounds like the title of a rape.<\/p>\n
But in this case, it really wasn’t. And this is how I worry how things will go if I get caught in that situation.<\/p>\n
I volunteered for the special fundraiser dinner today at the festival. Mostly because I was hesitant in giving money (so expensive!), but was willing to give time. Although I had thought that I only had volunteered for a small section of the dinner, specifically the setup and registration. That’s easily done\u00e2\u20ac\u201dI know how to set things up and get people registered. And the reward of free food!<\/p>\n
And so it started. Taiche said that I had a pass to the dinner, but I insisting on volunteering. Because I had committed to it. And I knew that there was a limited set of volunteers. For me to cancel at the last second felt very unlike me, very flakey.<\/p>\n
\ud83d\ude41<\/p>\n
then I had a teary breakdown when I was told to deliver food. Partly because I didn’t want to do this anymore. Partly because the numbering system didn’t make sense to me. Or did it? Or because I didn’t want to figure it out. But whatever the case, it felt overwhelming. And there was a snappy blond woman who seemed to come out of a kitchen and it was unclear. And suddenly it felt like I watching a TV show where I would be yelled at to deliver stuff to the right table at the right time. What would I get out of it beyond the pleasure of doing goodwill at the dinner?<\/p>\n
It felt horrible and I froze. I was frightened by the plates streaming out. I felt scared of the people at the table. Not in the way that they would judge me, but because my own standards demanded that I do it right. Demanded that I set the food down.<\/p>\n
It felt embarassing to be led away through the kitchen, suddenly with tears dripping down my face, hyperventilating (or was it faked\u00e2\u20ac\u201dor just a show)…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
That almost sounds like the title of a rape. But in this case, it really wasn’t. And this is how I worry how things will go if I get caught in that situation. I volunteered for the special fundraiser dinner today at the festival. Mostly because I was hesitant in giving money (so expensive!), but … Continue reading I knew that I didn’t want to do it, but I felt obligated<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-570","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/570","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=570"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/570\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":571,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/570\/revisions\/571"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=570"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=570"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/j.unoccupied.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=570"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}