If shame had a face
I think it would kind of
look like mine
if it had a home
would it be my eyes would
you believe me
if I said I am tired
of this now here we go
now one more time
I tried to climb your steps
I tried to chase
you down I tried to see
how low I could get down to the ground
I tried to earn my way
I tried to change
this mind you better believe
I tried to beat this
when will this end
it goes on and on over
and over and over again
keep spinning around
I know it won't stop
till I step down from this for good
I never thought I'd end up here
I never thought I'd be standing
where I am I guess
I kind of thought it
would be easier than this
I guess I was wrong now
one more time
this is a sick cycle carousel
this is a sick cycle, yeah

Sigh, I knew that I wouldn't get a chance to rave about the Lifehouse concert. It really was amazing. I got a chance to call Doreen and Stacee, who are total Lifehouse fans during the good songs. Personally I like "Sick Cycle Carousel".

I can't help crying. Again. Things that could have happened. Or never happened. But still. My heart is in pain. Why does it have to be like this? When I last touched him, his hands were squishy just the way I liked it. And we even smiled the last time we saw each other. Was it a mistake to begin with? Was it a mistake to end?
Then it's unfair. It's me. It's me. It's me. Well, online relationships don't count. They really don't. I know I did break a guy's heart once. I barely cared. I could have cared less.
But now I do. I barely write about the negative aspects. Those things aren't meant to be written, because they're fleeting thoughts. But why does it have to matter?

When will the tears stop flowing?
When will all this pain go away?
It's always the eyes that stay.
The last touch, the last feeling...
It's not a goodbye.
The salty drop on my fingers.
Nothing is ever easy.

Alex, you will always be my special friend...