Lately, I have been finding a new revelation each day. It's strange...sometimes I feel blessed with my life. Other times I feel cursed to be condemned to this place called Earth.
After the Maria-Rebecca-Julie incident occured, I was determined to show them that I wouldn't falter to the pessimistic, cynical, depressing rut I would fall into...after major breaks of friendship. And now, even though I don't have what I really wanted for Christmas (yes, that totally relates to life haha), I am more or less satisfied with what I have. Oh and even though I got a B in Philosophy...it's all good. Bleh, and even if my gpa doesn't look good for my intended major--computer science. It's all good. What sweet irony.

For the last few days, I have been waking up around 11 am. Yet, when I look into floor-to-ceiling mirror, I see deep eye bags. What's up with that? Is the Berkeley syndrome still following me around even during winter break? :p

I made sixty bucks in 1.5 hour. :) Although I sorta lied when the lady asked me if I had done a focus group in past the year...did it sometime in the fall. Nonetheless, they were discussing a probable basic cable channel called TechTv. They showed us commercials and asked to respond to them...saying whether it made us want to watch the channel and what the commercial told us. Repeatedly, I said that I wouldn't watch a channel without knowing what they specifically had to offer. Despite the fact that I was turning red (due my incredible social anxiety) throughout the hour and a half, I was successful in voicing my opinions. I liked the commercial where they zoomed out from a scene of a grandmother and a grandfather sitting together outside to a scene of a huge family watching the video on tv to a scene of the grandson copying movies onto a dvd to a scene where the grandson watches a TechTv show - "how to put home movies on dvd" to a scene where the grandson receives an invitation of a 50th anniversary party. Awww...how sweet! The other commercials were typical...and dull. The group was around 18-25. Surprisingly, two people were already married plus the focus group moderator.
I was happy that I didn't get needlessly embarrassed. Happy that the focus group moderator asked us each individually to contribute our opinion rather than having a group discussion. Yes, I suck at group discussion...especially those where...free-talking is allowed. Where am I supposed to cut in? Where am I supposed to blurt out? Where will I sutter...and turn red again?

Yesterday, I watched True Life: I am a dwarf on MTV. Admittedly, most of the stuff on MTV is dumb...stupid...and raunchy. Yet, I was intrigued. They weren't glorified. And they quite often...hated to play the role of mini elves only there to amuse you. Yes, we do want to be appreciated for who we are rather than what we are.

Today, I began my search for a porta potty. Although I should have taken Stacey's suggestion to just take my camera wherever I go...my desires were too great. I left my house around 3 pm and headed to downtown Walnut Creek. Somehow along the way, I passed two porta potties...but they were on the other side of the street and I didn't feel like making a U-turn. (Nowadays, I am getting sensitive to motion...motion sickness.) So I kept chugging. I found one porta potty in the parking lot of the John Muir Medical Center. Okay, so I felt like a reporter intruding the area. I slyly walked back the Porta Potty trying to see whether it contained the word "unoccupied". Unfortunately, it did not. All it had was a shade of green with absolutely no words. After I returned to my car, I realized that i could have just taken the picture and digitally insert the word unoccupied in it. Well...keep chugging. I drove everywhere, but eventually I got lost. Not totally lost. I knew if I went north, I would end up on the main road again. Yet, my urge to explore...and hope that i would find another main road by going south...kept me going...and made me make thousands of U-turns when I reached the Mt. Diablo ranch. How sucky. I found Northgate High School though. Yes, just like how Cliff described it, it is a huge cement block. Finally had to go north...and get back to the main road. At the last minute, I spotted a green Porta Potty in Shadelands. I decided that I wanted a picture of the entire potty before I moved in for a close up. I clicked. Nothing happen. I switched the camera to the other auto function. *click* then *whir* AGH! It ran out of film!!! And the camera...as sucky as it is...always cuts off the last picture. ARGH!
And yes, I went back home...in rush hour.

Are you insane? I am.