Can I say that I am bitter? After two months of enduring heartache (and not to mention a constant deluge of salty tears flowing down my cheeks), I could not help but to conclude that some guys really do suck.

Those two big words. Romantic relationship. Note the two r's. We are a society so highly affected by the media and those two words magically conjure images of two smiling people with eyes only for each other. Unfortunately, it's not always as so.

I was what some people called naive. In high school, I barely had much of a relationship. Let's just say that as a result of certain torments by classmates had reduced me to the politically correct adjective - socially challenged. By the first year of college, I had wanted to start a new life. Easy enough said. Oh yes, that ideal life - many friends (a best friend would be a definite must) and of course, a boyfriend.

Yesterday, my sister told me what a guy said to her once. "You can't choose who you're attracted toward." So what if there are people that are attracted toward everybody? It may represent a constant search for acceptance. So just accept it!

But let's fast forward past all the "superficial" happiness and to the bitterness that came out of the fluffy freshman year. Maybe I was just an unique case. Or at least he was. For sophiscation, I would call it an emotionally abusive relationship. I never felt that I was good enough. Let's not forget to add that I was constantly and literally labeled as second in his piteous life. I have a right to be angry. However, this time, it has caused consequences. Where am I to find trust? I once thought I was a carrot, where when placed in a pot, it turns into an orange mushy plop. Now I feel that I am more of an egg, where once placed in boiling water hardens and is never liquid again.