When I first started college, I had a makeover. I made over myself. I left high school with no friends and entering college, one of my goals was to be one of those popular charismatic people. Although I did achieve it, I never was able to reach somewhere where I would be ok to forgiving for someone for their trepass. I still don\’t.
Yesterday, the retired professor told me how her children\’s best friends now were from undergrad or grad school. their lifetime friends. I am leaving college with so few. and possibly losing a lot of connections. Is that why I am an effort to be friendly with everyone in this last summer in the bay area?
These days it\’s getting hard for me to carry a random conversation. My mind is always numbed. But then I am worried that I am making others feel uncomfortable because this almost causes an awkward silence. I just can\’t let myself…go free. and so is this why I am hanging out by myself after 6 pm while in Pittsburgh? I feel more at east when I am by myself.