He called it a break-up. Even though we weren\’t together. It was almost like breaking up. He asked me why I did it. Why do I do it? I gave my futile excuses. I am afraid of getting hurt. I don\’t know how to forgive.
I live my life as I feel it. Not quite logical, not quite rule-based. People come and go. That\’s the main reason that I sometimes don\’t understand why I am so important to someone. Why do people get upset at me when I am just one of the many people they know? Why would he be jealous of Chris Wong. Online, it will never seem like I divided my attention among people. Rather, I am as civil as myself.
Sometimes I find it so much easier to talk to Chris Wong than…this Chris.
I hate the feeling that…anything I do may be the last time that I do it. There are times that i don\’t know that it may be the last time I do something. The last time I talk to someone. But that\’s so much focus on the future. It\’s the present that I am concerned about. Or should be concerned about.