And really, I wish that I did the same.
Is it jealousy? Is it envy?
I wish that I could curse every single bone in your body. That or that I could break them all. But I know that it\’s because I am feeling helpless and I blame you for taking away my clarity, my strength. I blame you for letting me be someone who I was not. I wish that I didn\’t bend for you. Because I am lying in despair, destruction. Broken.
I feel stabs so deeply, cutting deeply in the flesh that I have remaining. And I feel the feathers of darkness move past my face. They tug on my gut and I absolutely hate it.
Stop taking it away from me.
Do you feel the strike of a sudden tremor when you hear my name? I know I do when your name appears and I feel only anger that seers wildly through my soul. I purse my lips when I think of you. Only contempt. I know that I cannot talk to you—because I am lacking compassion, I am lacking any feeling of sympathy and respect for you. I can imagine myself only giving you multiple fingers. Stay away from what I built so carefully and give me back everything that I gave you.
Because right now, I don\’t think that you deserve it.