Even though I am tired after interacting with so many people, I stil feel a sense of loneliness afterwards. Like nostalgia.
I devote energy to needless things. The boys I like. My need to get food from many different places. And a desire to make people laugh.
I wonder if I still have that ability–to make people laugh. For some, I am some sort of entertainment. It\’s not something I really like.
Anxieties about myself? I wonder…if I am pretentious, self-centered, self-absorbed, obnoxious? Rude and abrasive? I worry so much about myself.
I delived the annoucements to Karen today. after my first appointment, I used the rescomp wireless and imed her. I went down to Cory Hall and called her research lab phone using my cellphone. She came down and we began having a conversation right in the middle of the hallway. Suddenly, a secretary from the Undergraduate Engineering Student Affairs came by. She asked if Karen could present an award. I was jealous. I never had such a honor. We discussed our current issues. A glimmer of hope maybe?
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