It almost was like a dream, but it wasn\’t. I haven\’t succeeded, found someone like this for a long time.
But I know I am afraid of being hurt. And I feel like I am setting up myself for failure. I am almost expecting any moment, he will come back and say…I don\’t want this. No more. And it\’s the fear, perhaps the desire…I don\’t want to feel insecure that way.
Last night, after I had fallen asleep multiple times with him hugging me–arms all over, holding me. Bodies entwined, not wanting to let go, underneath a cool winter night. He tasted me and our lips touched. Almost barely.
Jennnnn… he said barely above a whisper. The darkness had enveloped us, I couldn\’t see his eyes. I love you. I am sorry I don\’t seem serious about things, but I never knew I would care about someone so much. You mean so much to me.