“So you want to withdraw?” I said.
Which I repeated at least 5 times, because she said that she couldn’t hear me on the phone. So I repeated myself with the same volume and with the same phrasing.
By the end of this 37 minute phone call, I was actually quite disgruntled and bitter.
I don’t know what happened but the whole idea was to do a stamp club thingie. So I thought yes, let’s make it happen.
But then it became quite clear as i had noted when we first met that the idea would not happen. As I was leaving the bar, I said, “So about these things, if you want to make it happen, I am committed all the way. I will make it happen. Will you?”
And from that, we had a conversation about it and then I suggested reaching out to people—which I did.
And then it was today that it piled all into.
First, I was probably annoyed that it was a phone call. Because I couldn’t tell exactly why we were talking on a phone—was it because she wanted to explain with voice about why she couldn’t stay committed? I didn’t quite understand. And then she suggested something more informal—a mailing list! But I know what that takes and I was bothered by it. Considering the effort it took to moderate a community, I didn’t want to be part of it.
If people didn’t know each other, then they wouldn’t communicate because of the fear of getting in the way. Or it would be too much and in the end, nobody would say anything.
But then the idea i suggested—a booklet, maybe a postcard could help.
And it went in circles.
But all of this was supposed to be in the google doc. I believed that if we put all our ideas in writing then the right approach would be more clear. But I was annoyed that she didn’t want to take that approach. Instead, she suggested talking in person.
Like it was an issue of feelings.
But it wasn’t. To me, it was clearly just a misinterpretation of the objective and the principles of what things were supposed to be!