Many people might describe it as aggressive. Others might say that I was trying to get attention.
But all I wanted was for the van to move out of the way. I was tired. Exhausted really. I realize that yes people need to do their work. But unlike all the inconveniences in our lives, the idea of being blocked isn’t simply just walking several hundred more feet or having to pay extra. It’s the fact that it’s completely unknown. I don’t want to scratch someone’s car. I don’t want to ruin mine. But rather, it’s the fact that when blocked in, it’s all uncertainty of when and where.
So when I spilled out of the front door on Sunday morning (mind you: this morning was also filled with a homeless guy waking up everyone on the block as he yelled at nothing and nobody), this whole year and the rudeness of the neighboring business, my patience was wearing thin. Also Chris was dealing with a lack of sleep due to the homeless man. So there was already thin tension.
I saw the van. It was a budget rental van for some guy that was unloading spin scooters around the block. I got in the car and said, “What are we supposed to do?”
He drove out. I couldn’t hold the obvious any longer and reached over to honk. Once. Twice. Thrice. No response from the driver. “What now?” I said.
“Go out,” he said.
And I did. It should have been obvious, but it wasn’t. Or maybe he knew. I walked to the van and pulled at the passenger side door. To my surprise, it opened and the driver ran over, angry. Now that I think about it, he was watching all this time! Otherwise, why would he run over and start yelling at me. I was so surprised that I sputtered, “I was looking for someone to move the van. The driveway is blocked.”
You see, I am not someone who is immediately angry. My anger, in fact, comes much later in waves and usually in words that I write. I am generally incapable of expressing my anger in the moment unless helped by a trusted friend to help shape my words. So I was frightened, but stood my ground, because he was blocking the driveway. I repeated it.
He must have got annoyed with the fact that I refused to say anything else so he went over to the car and yelled at Chris. I couldn’t hear what Chris said. In short, it escalated and all I heard were shouts, obscentities, etc. I heard something a bit alarming about how the guy was going to “f this place up”.
At this point, the SFFD peep came over from the cafe across the street. I didn’t even realize that they were there. But they’re always there, because the cafe is in a good location for a fire truck to park in the middle of the street (or who knows maybe the owners like them). Somehow the SFFD convince the guy to move the van and he did while calling them “white friends” and “crackers”. I said that I wasn’t one. Then the guy went over to yell at Chris again. it was the usual stuff that often happens on the street, but I tensed up at the threats on the home and possibly lives. I didn’t want to be a karen, but I didn’t know if it would happen.
And mostly it got worse from there until it ruined the day.